It’s the hashtag shaking up social media—coined by Charlmagne tha God and Lil Duval in what some would call a sarcastic nuance of what black women desire, #BlackMenDon’tCheat controversy continues to invade urban forums, easing its way into pillow talks, weekly brunch tea and, ironically barbershops.
It’s no secret that black men get a bad rep. Excluding sex, some would say they’re the most difficult to attain at their fullest potential, especially when presented with traditional monogamy.
Historically speaking, the dynamics of black love has been a bittersweet story of notable triumph and deeply-rooted challenges that further push the stigma that ‘niggas ain’t shit’, and while all men aren’t the same, let’s be honest, there’s a clear consensus in the ladies room.
So, just how genuine is #BlackMenDon’tCheat, is it intentful or satire at its best?
A beautiful sentiment similar to Black Girl Magic, some have said such a phrase formally affirms the intended position of the black man by creating opportunity for the foundation of healthy relationships and tarnishing bro behavior. Take the 21-Ninety Rule for example, if you commit to a task for twenty-one days the likelihood of the ingrained behavior is more-likely to become a habit, much like this repetitive hashtag.
But some beg to differ, for there is such a thing as gaslighting. Think about it, with a comedian and unpopular-opinion personality at the forefront of such a sound statement, the masses can’t help but wonder if it’s all a joke. A ruse if you will, teasing black women with genuine concern for the state of untrusting black male partners. As this trend continues to surface, I too can’t help but understand its legitimacy in relation to hot topics surrounding known celebrity cheat-offenders, soon following evidence placing them at the scene, and yet a facetious “I don’t know what you’re alluding to, but Black men don’t cheat” –it’s all too funny.
In fact, to further its inaccuracy a 2018 stats report from the Institute of Family Studies showed that while 20% of men admitted to engaging in extramarital sex between 2010-2016 than that of 13% women, 28% of black men had engaged in extramarital sex that that of 20% white and 16% latin males.
Did I just hear a quack?
Regardless of whether or not #BlackMenDon’tCheat pokes the bear or challenges toxic sociocultural norms within the black community, the overall pro is that it sparks awareness and starts a serious conversation for relationship expectations. Toxicity does not begin or end with infidelity and while it’s important to have a committed relationship, remember the overall gist is to date and commit to whole partners.
What do you think? Let us know below.
Dey is a noted multidisciplinary creative and writer covering everything from what to listen to, to what to do. When she’s not writing, she’s crashing concerts, developing content, and living her best life! Find her on Twitter or Instagram.